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Wonderings

Sometimes I wonder.......

How come there are such people in this world?

But then again, there are all sorts of people in this world. So its not that big a surprise.

Actually, they can say whatever they want. Mouth is theirs. We all have to answer to a higher power in the future.

I don't dare to say that I am right all the time. I may have done things that I wished that I did not and said things that I should not have. But there is one thing that I can be very certain of. I never have any bad intentions in my mind.

I will not take anything that I did not earn.

So that is why I hate is when people says that I ask money from my bf or that I wanna cheat anyone of their money. I also do not like it when people says that whatever I have is due to other people's credit. I have worked my ass off (EMPHASIZING) for whatever I have today.

I did not get where I am by being a 2 head snake.

I work harder and longer than others.

I put in real effort and that is why the things that I bought with these money are real dear to me. Coz they are from my 'sing xue' (direct translation: heart blood).

Actually......I am quite surprised myself at being able to control my emotion much better this time around. Maybe its because I am numb from everything.

But I really have to thank someone for telling about 'Tao". I feel that its really the appropriate time. Its like someone sent an angel to tell me these things and making me feel better about the whole situation.

There is silver lining in every cloud. There is a bright side to everything and everything happened for a reason.

I truly believe that God will not give me a test that is beyond my ability to overcome.

I should be grateful. Grateful that I am living in a relatively peaceful country where there are so many benefits. I am grateful that my family are together still and safe and sound and loves me. I am for a bf who loves me.

I know that this post might not be very coherent. But this is what is on my mind. Thoughts that are still swimming around in my head.

Sometimes we need to sit and think whether what we have done is right or wrong and whether we had hurt anyone in the process of getting what we want.

One very important principle of mine is that I should not hurt anyone in order to get what I want.

People who knows me and understand me will know my character. I may be stubborn, loud and have a bad temper but I will not con other people. I do not do evil things. For that my conscience is clear and I can sleep easy.

You reap what you sow. How true these words are to become. Impossible you plant a melon seed and you get a bitter gourd.

So yeah, I'll go to bed now and sleep easy and dream of eating my sweet melon.

Nite everyone


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